low fucking power meant
lookin dour like sour grapes
cos the sun didn’t shine like it used to and i am used to
better fait accomplis
and on top of me the world seemed
couldn’t shrug cos my objectives were different
less randy more brandied in hard liqour and arrogant dismissal
i guess
cos choice words only used when choice isn’t there
and life always fairly pessimistic cos the hatred is intrinsic
and internalised
and no surprises saved for later
ever present in past sets
so the hanging ivy still a pipe dream
cos
that would mean the future had an ending
and pretending any different is a lie
and stood up by expectation cos her date still waiting
replicating replicants in exodus
as the blade runs across unexplored nubian landscapes
but i got plans
pan african yet stayed stranded so black so looks underhanded
hand over fist this whipped kid hid and let slits become palaces
a slave to fucking avarice
besotted to her chariot i used to a ride waves


maybe future plans remain unplotted
but zeigeist of a fake fucking star sign might realise
time was never different
and days never better
might not remember but it sure as fuck beats december
or any other month that matter
cos the chatter feels distant,
oh so dismissive of adhering now appearing sane
still dressing the same sorry wounds with similar dressing
but undressing different dresses
annointing the unrequited
ghosting so they probably feel slighted or slightly bemused
confused at a nigger so rude
but
i intrude
persued by persuing at every shoulder,
good thing i got my boy janus to look for me,
genus broken down dialectically
directing me to paths unknown
cos the split represents schitz to me
like the world and reality
so i feel more alone
but i’ll condone a few brews a few qs
a few more shrooms cos now im feeling lifted
the tabs got me lucid
the keys opened horses dreams to eyes of a boy so sleepless see

low fucking power meant years spent looking for escape,
from self hate or tryna placate the demons
seen as teeming with regret
never worthy of respect
so what did you expect
i packed my bags
up and left
took the weight off my chest
days abroad, feeling blessed
no fucks to have to press
ain’t dealing with no stress
unfold those crinkled rizla roll you rotterdam grams,
suns kissed glistening trams
parks sat felt land
drowning once im saved now
sauce got me chasing fraus
weed got me seeing clowns
all adrian van de plaas
so, fuck with now
cos a nigger back on his bullshit
talking all this new shit
like new friends, who dis
got me walking foolish
xans got me teeth looking devilish
so prevelant irrevelevance now reverence
oh so obsequious
so good they treating us
fangs out
who tryna fuck with me now